emkothenoi_viemqua_yeuanh
17-09-2009, 03:48 PM
I knew, from the beginning. That. Let. Go. Of your hands. I'd regret. I'd cry.
But still I could not telling myself to stop doing what's hurting you badly. I'm so tired. Tired of everything. I want us to go back. I cried so much but still that doesn't make any difference. That doesn't give me courage to call you. To. Tell. You. That.
I MISS YOU!
I NEED YOU!
I WANT YOU!
I miss your face, miss your words, I miss everything that exists between us. I just have to cry to let out everytime your image appears in my mind. I grow into depression. I don't want to talk. I hate talking. I hate telling others my feelings, because I only want you to listen. I want only you to understand it. I don't care if they think I've changed. I don't mind if I grow into a weirdo in others' eyes. I can careless. I need you. And that's more than just "enough".
I screamed.
I yelled.
Nothing seems to move around me.
So I just sat there.
Silent.
No talking.
No moving.
Just there. Hours.
And I can't hold it neimore when my first tear started to rush down my cheek. I let it out, and it felt so bad. Like I couldn't cry out everything. It just making me feel worser and worser. I feel so weak. I feel like I just want to die.
I miss you much I wish I can see you. Hug you. Tight.
I need you so much.
I tried so many things. I tried to smile like how they told me to. "Smile, and you will get thru everything". What a lie. A big lie! It doesn't. It's just so fake?!
It's fake. Everything is fake.
I'm fake.
....
....
....
I just know my heart is real. That feeling for you is real. You are real. I want you. And that's also real.
I love you.
So.
Much.
But still I could not telling myself to stop doing what's hurting you badly. I'm so tired. Tired of everything. I want us to go back. I cried so much but still that doesn't make any difference. That doesn't give me courage to call you. To. Tell. You. That.
I MISS YOU!
I NEED YOU!
I WANT YOU!
I miss your face, miss your words, I miss everything that exists between us. I just have to cry to let out everytime your image appears in my mind. I grow into depression. I don't want to talk. I hate talking. I hate telling others my feelings, because I only want you to listen. I want only you to understand it. I don't care if they think I've changed. I don't mind if I grow into a weirdo in others' eyes. I can careless. I need you. And that's more than just "enough".
I screamed.
I yelled.
Nothing seems to move around me.
So I just sat there.
Silent.
No talking.
No moving.
Just there. Hours.
And I can't hold it neimore when my first tear started to rush down my cheek. I let it out, and it felt so bad. Like I couldn't cry out everything. It just making me feel worser and worser. I feel so weak. I feel like I just want to die.
I miss you much I wish I can see you. Hug you. Tight.
I need you so much.
I tried so many things. I tried to smile like how they told me to. "Smile, and you will get thru everything". What a lie. A big lie! It doesn't. It's just so fake?!
It's fake. Everything is fake.
I'm fake.
....
....
....
I just know my heart is real. That feeling for you is real. You are real. I want you. And that's also real.
I love you.
So.
Much.